Just yesterday at work we were talking about what lessons we’ve learned throughout the pandemic that we’ll take forward into the future. While I had thought about new habits and new projects I wanted to keep, I hadn’t given any thought to what lessons I’ve learned.
What came to me at that moment, has not only made me reflect but also made me feel like a bit of weight has come off my shoulders.
I have long been someone who likes to feel in control. When I can have it I feel confident, when I don’t I often feel anxious. With that question posed yesterday, I realized that the past two years have taught me that I don’t need to feel that way. When I remember that I have the tools and supports, that I can access those tools and supports, and that I should when I need to, I don’t have to be in control. I can adapt to what is thrown at me.
Before the pandemic, I already knew that I couldn’t always be in control, but I also knew that I hated that, and fought against that reality whenever possible. This hasn’t been good for my mental or physical health, for my relationships, or for me to be the person I want to be living my life as.
The more I think about how I really can just let myself be okay without being in control, and that I have what I’ll need to hold me up during those times (or pick me up if I fall), the more weight seems to be coming off of my shoulder, the easier it feels to keep moving forward.
Featured image courtesy of Amman Wahab Nizamani under a CC-BY-SA license.