On Friday I listened to the first episode of Chris Bailey’s podcast, which just happens to be called Becoming Better, and he was interviewing Georgetown Professor Cal Newport about the lure of social media and just how much of our time and energy is spent scrolling instead of living. Coincidentally I happened to have some negative interactions online late that afternoon and decided I needed a break so I deleted both Twitter and Facebook from my phone and iPad and didn’t look at social media at all from Friday evening until Monday morning. I have to admit, overall it felt good.
It wasn’t easy, which is both why I deleted the apps instead of just swearing off of them and a sign that I need to do that more often.
I spent time with my family, including all of us having dinner at the new home of some friends. We went for lunch and groceries. I made cookies (my first time using our heavy duty kitchen mixer) for our dinner with friends and did laundry. I exercised, journaled, and read. We watched The Crown (we’re rewatching it before Season 3 comes out). My daughter and I played catch and goofed around a lot.
I would have done most of these things whether or not I was on a break from social media, but I was more relaxed both because I wasn’t watching people being hurtful to each other or seeing bad news scroll past and I had more time to do things so I felt less rushed. I did read some news online, but it was by going to a couple of newspaper websites instead of following the links that others have shared.
Am I ready to completely give up on social media? No.
I use Twitter for a lot of things including promoting this site (my negative interaction had nothing to do with Better Me). I also use Facebook and Instagram for that. I grew up in California and lived in Toronto for four years before settling down in Saskatoon so my friends and family are pretty scattered. If I hadn’t been on Facebook I wouldn’t have known that a friend in California was very sick. His son posted that they were collecting email messages to read to him. I would have missed sending him a heartfelt message before he died. For me to give up social media, everyone else in my life would have to as well and then find a new way to connect at a distance (don’t blame me, I write letters).
I can, however, see giving it up for short stretches of time (like weekends) and change how I’m using it. This week for example, I’m trying not to engage with anyone I don’t know.
In the podcast, which I recommend you listen to, Bailey and Newport suggested that you can’t just give up social media, you have to find something to do during that time. This is the same advice that James Clear, author of Atomic Habits and Charles Duhigg author of The Power of Habit gave in their books. I can’t keep baking cookies (well I can, but it wouldn’t be good for me), but when I feel like looking at my phone to just check those apps I can pull out my journal and write even one sentence. I can go for a quick walk. I can write a letter or pick up the phone and call someone.
Featured image courtesy of Jason Howie under a CC-BY license.
