We All Stumble

Running up stairs

I started Better Me almost three years ago, when I was doing really well. I’d come out of a bout of depression about a year earlier and wanted to share with the world things that I had done or was trying to do to be a “better me”. I didn’t disclose that these things that I did were part of my effort to try to manage, recover from, and stave off future bouts of depression for another year.

Nobody has their shit all together. Seriously, nobody, no matter how they project themselves on Instagram, blogs, television, etc. nobody has their shit all together. Acknowledging that right there will make you happier and treat yourself better.

Even when we’re at the best we can be, we stumble. Maybe we get sick and it throws us off our routines. Maybe there’s a pandemic and ugly political divide (racism by the way is pure evil and we all have some of it inside of us) and the stress lends to you eating way more sugar than you normally would, or binging on news or ugliness on social media, which also messes with your sleep and leaves your mind and body feeling tied up in knots. Sound familiar?

First, don’t kick yourself about it. Acknowledge what’s going on and do the best you can on any given day.

Second, remember that the people around you also don’t have their shit all together and you most likely don’t know their whole story, even if it’s your spouse and kids.

Third, just because life is hard and you may be doing the best you can today, that doesn’t mean you can’t try to do a bit better tomorrow. The world needs us all to be doing a bit better (the combination would accumulate into more than just a bit better).

Are you going to be better every day? No, it’s not going to happen. Things come up, but if you spend more days trying to be a better you in some way (learn something new, be a little more patient, walk up the stairs instead of taking the elevator, etc.), then overall you will be a better you. Even with several bouts of depression, I’m a way better me than I was even 10 years ago.

Just remember, nobody has their shit all together. Not you, not me, not any of the “influencers” on social media. Nobody. Should you try to be a better you, even just a little bit? Yes, absolutely. If you truly love yourself, if you want to be a role model for your children and those around you, then you should be trying to bring the best person you can be on any given day. You will stumble, you will have doubts and you will be tempted to beat yourself, but please don’t. It’s far harder to recover from a fall when you keep pushing yourself down.

When you inevitably stumble, get up. If you need a hand, ask for it. No, we’re not all in this together, but imagine how much better we’d all be if we were.

Featured image courtesy of Best Picko under a CC-BY license.

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