I have never really been a particularly patient person, and it became even more of an issue during the toughest months of my depression. My fuse became quite short whether that meant me being quick to anger or cry over things that I shouldn’t have felt the need. As I’m getting better and back into my groove, I’m trying very hard to be a more patient person.
The other day, while meditating, I was frustrated at how busy my mind was during that time. Tamara Levitt who narrates the daily meditations that I do, commented about having patients with ourselves during meditation. Most people have busy minds and have trouble staying focused throughout even a short meditation. It occurred to me that if I’m going to become more patient with others I need to become more patient with myself.
I get impatient with myself over my lack of focus during meditation. I get impatient with myself when I don’t get done the things I want to accomplish in a day. I was definitely impatient with myself for being depressed and it taking so long to get better.
I need to work on being more patient with myself while I’m working on being more patient with others. It’s like the oxygen mask idea. I have to take care of myself first if I’m going to be able to help others. I can’t truly be patient and kind to others until I learn to be more patient and kind with myself.
Featured image courtesy of Jeetps under a CC-BY-SA license.
