The People Who Love You Because of Your Imperfections

Brene Brown and Chase Jarvis

So a funny thing happened a couple of weeks ago. For probably the tenth time, I happened across this video clip of Dr. Brené Brown speaking with Chase Jarvis about creativity and vulnerability. I’ve watched the whole interview, but Jarvis shared this particular clip in a tweet in which he said:

This advice from @brenebrown is a game changer. Pause what you’re doing right now and make your list.

While the entire interview, which is at the bottom of this post, is great, in this particular clip, Dr. Brown describes how she stays focused on whose opinion of her matters to her.

Get a very small piece of paper, I suggest one inch by one inch. And on that piece of paper you put the names of people whose opinions actually matter to you. I carry my list with me … and on it are the people whose opinions of me really, really matter … So these people on my list and the people who I think should be on everyone’s list are the people who love you not despite your vulnerability and imperfections, but because of your vulnerability and imperfections.

So after watching that clip yet again, I shared Jarvis’s tweet, and much to my pleasant surprise, he replied to me. If Dr. Brown had chimed in I might just have fainted.

I then accepted his challenge, pulled out a note card, and cut out a piece that’s about one by one inch and wrote the names of the people in my life who I think love me because of my vulnerability and imperfections. I keep it in my planner, though I may put a copy in my wallet like Dr. Brown recommends. And I agree with her, everyone should have a list like this.

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